Skip to main content

A journal a day...

Getting in touch with your thoughts, your emotions, and even your fears is, I think, a really important part of your transition. More importantly, as I am coming to realize, recording them is even more valuable.

I was never really one for being especially good at keeping a journal, I tried it on and off over the years and never really got very far for any length of time. While I would like to pin that on the tools I used, the truth is that I never had a momentous sense of change in my life that needed me to have the outlet for my thoughts.

I know that many of us, myself included, have worked with therapists and that's been really helpful, but it's usually short sessions and I can't really go back to them and think about my reactions and comments as they happened. I also find that I don't really get a chance to fully articulate my thoughts because it isn't every day. When I sit down to meet with my therapist, it's a week or two weeks later (just recently moved to every two weeks) and so much has passed since the last time.

This is where a journal starts to really make a difference. I've been using mine since my first day of HRT and have been very consistent with it (i.e. daily) for more than a month. There are a few reasons for this, I think, but the biggest one is that I feel that I really need to have a record, each day, of the journey I am on. I am not going through the motions, I am living, and now I want to be able to remember it.

I am also tracking so significant personal goals day every day, including a better diet, more exercise, and (significantly) reduced alcohol consumption. A journal makes that easier for me.

All in all, the journal is starting to take the place of my therapist for me. I find the ability to get my thoughts out, to express how I am feeling, whether happy or sad, in the time they are happening is super critical for my journey. There's a cathartic feel to being able to let out the thoughts, express my doubts, challenge my notions, and even describe how I envision my future. It's been powerful.

Now, everyone is a little different, but I am recommending that you give it a try.

So, what am I using? Well, I went through a few applications before settling on Scrivener. I've been using Scrivener for a while, for writing, but only recently thought about it as a journal, but it's actually quite perfect for me. I have template set up for my structure and I find that it basically gets out of my way. I did try a few others, specifically GoodNotes and MacJournal. GoodNotes initially appealed for the cross-device support, but synching was hit or miss and information was getting lost when switching devices. MacJournal, which seems to be highly regarded, I also found unreliable and a lot awkward. So, Scrivener scratched the desired itch. I do have the iPad version, but I have not set up for Dropbox synchronization for now since I don't really need it on the iPad. If I travel, I may reconsider.


While you're here, you might like:

I am so angry at the harm

I don't know how else to put it. I am furious.

I will cut people out of my life for this

The Conservative Party of Canada just voted to added blocks on gender affirming medical care for trans kids and to end race-based hiring. I'm done being polite to people in my life when it comes to this.

Bill Mahar is weak

The surest sign of a weak man is a man who feels the need to assert his manliness to the world. Bill Mahar is a weak man.