Skip to main content

A Month Away!

In one short month I will be seeing a doctor, for the first time, to discuss HRT options. What a journey to get to this point and, yes, I am nervous.
Nervous, you ask? Of course.

So, here's the thing: after nearly 50 years of fighting myself, I find it to be a hard habit to break. If I was good a that, I would have broken it much sooner.

Here I am, though, in my early 50s, feeling like I'm about to re-enter puberty and it's scary. Is it the right thing? Am I making a mistake? Am I being caught up in my emotions, the time and place we're in?

I do feel some element of my own sense of mortality playing a role here. I am in my 50s. The world is not what it was. I think that is a factor, I'd be lying to myself if I said otherwise. I feel like time is running out for me.

I am a product of my generation's upbringing. I've shrugged away much of the nonsense pseudo-science that surrounded the LGBT community of that day, but your history has a powerful hold on your subconscious mind and that rises, often in my dreams now, it seems.

Well and all, it's a month away. I'm a little anxious, a lot nervous, and feeling giddy and excited at the same time. I guess that's the spice of life, no?

Comments

  1. Hi Joanne, good luck sweetie. When that anxiousness comes try and take some slow deep breathes.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

While you're here, you might like:

Shaming men with transphobia and misogyny

I've seen this countless times in my life, I can't even tell you how often any more. It's been a constant presence in my life as far as I can remember: the notion that you can shame men using imagery of them as a women and girls.

Amazon's Harm

As a software engineer, and a leader of software engineers, I often think about the user experience. Almost every piece of software I have worked on, or been responsible for, has had a connection to the average consumer. Awareness of the consumer is critical.

This felt inevitable

So, on December 4th, the National Post front page had a story lede that claimed a 16 year old girl transitioned after two quick doctor's appointments and then regretted it.